I Know You Too Well
by Valedicktorian
Summary: AU one shots, and this is now an AkaSaku story. I will update as much as I can. Chapter 6 is up! Its titled Taking Care of Business. Summary of most recent oneshot: Kakuzu is her boss, and he is not pleased that she is continually late. Humor, smut, rated M.
1. I Know You Too Well

Summary: Sakura has had it with Deidara's being late, but is everything as it seems?

'I know you to well to like you any more...'

"I'm leaving." Sakura snarled. Her hands were firmly planted on her hips, leaned forward and flushed in anger. "You didn't give me the chance to explain!" The blond begged. His emphatic blue eyes pleaded with her to listen. For a second the pinkette felt guilty, but she swallowed it down.

"I don't care, you forgot, how could you? You just left me with the dinner I cooked going cold while you were out at your fucking gallery!"

"I did it for you!" He yelled. She looked at him incredulously. He was pinning this on her? What the actual fuck.

"You always pull this with me, at first I thought it was cute how much you love your art," she took a deep breath, "but now it seems to come before me, before anything, and that scares me." Her voice had faded, plagued by insecurities. "What if we started a family, what kind of life is that for a kid?" She let loose a large sigh. "I... Don't know what to feel anymore. I still care about you and love you, but obviously those feelings aren't returned... At least enough to remember what day it is, or was." She fixed him with a firm stare, a challenge to contradict her. He would pick up the gauntlet that had been thrown.

"No! They are, I promise!" His voice seemed to crackle with desperation. He did remember! The thought of losing her scared him to the core. His Adam's apple bobbed at the tension. Their relationship had always been fiery. When it was good, it was very very good, but when it was bad, it was horrid. 'That girl with the curl on her forehead.' He thought of that old rhyme. It suited his girl so well. Sakura could easily make a grown man piss himself. He'd learned that on a personal level. Not something he'd wish to experience again. No thank you, sir.

"Don't leave... I love you so much, why won't you believe me?"

"Deidara, actions speak louder than words, and this can't be ignored." Her eyes seemed pained, caught between a rock and a hard place. "What made our relationship beautiful was the spontaneousness and surprises. Not this kind though, the kind of bad surprise that your boyfriend didn't come home for his anniversary." Her disappointed frown wounded him more than a punch. It wrinkled her lovely forehead. He wanted to smooth away all the problems.

It was true, their fierce personalities had crashed beautifully, which also led to fights. The love they had for each other was a double edged sword. When they first met, it was dislike at first sight. She thought his hair was girly, and he thought she had a big forehead.

$ $ Flashback$ $

They had met in a supermarket, both reaching for the same bottle of conditioner. His guyliner was so on point when she met his eyes, she was tempted to ask for his technique.

The challenge in his gaze was enough to side track her though. She was never one to step down. Neither was he. It had ended with an almost cat fight, with her pulling his hair, and him flicking her forehead. Hard.

The store manager had ended up kicking them both out, and no one got the conditioner. For weeks, it had been the unspoken bet as to who would get the precious conditioner first.

Deidara had grown sick of the game, showing up and asking her out instead. Blindside her was what he really did. Easy score, right?

"No."

"No?"

"No."

"But why~" his voice was drawn out, petulant and whiney. The pout on his face matched his girly, (lovely) hair.

"You jackass, you repeatedly took my conditioner!"

"It's a free country, I'll do what I want, yeah. See you, Sakura."

Wait, how did he know her name?

That night he showed up at her house, dressed to the nines, and wouldn't stop ringing her fucking doorbell.

She came out, dressed in jeans and a T-shirt

"Are you fucking serious?"

"As serious as herpes, Sakura." His face was so set, not even a twitch of his lips showed. Either he was a fabulous a actor, or he was for real.

She was immediately taken aback by his weird, borderline crazy comparisons. Her mouth was left dangling in an unladylike manner. What even? Yep, totally bonkers.

He took this opportunity to grab her wrist, tugging her along the sidewalk to his car.

"Let's go, yeah. I have a reservation at The Lumiere at seven."

The Lumiere?! Who was this man and how could he get in to a place like that only in a day? She was sure the food was made of magic and happiness, and the drinks were angels' tears. She stumbled along, he obviously wasn't gonna let her go, and he'd give her food. Food is good... She glanced down at her attire, considering if she cared how she looked. Nah. Fuck the snobs at Lumiere.

This might have been the most abso-fucking-lutely dumb thing she'd ever done. Whatever, she wasn't known to resist impulses.

Deidara actually turned out to a successful sculptor and painter, but even more impressive, he was funny. Humor was a must in any man she'd ever consider dating. Maybe... He wasn't the sissy boy she thought he was.

Many more dates were to come, with just as many arguments, but no matter what, nothing could seem to separate the couple. It was like glue, what stuck them together, but as glue tended to do, things got sticky.

$ $ Flashback End $ $

He rushed her and almost tackled her small body. For an artist, he had muscle. Muscle weighs more than fat, so she almost fell. Burying his face into her tummy, she saw something amazing, something she had never seen before.

He was crying.

For her.

Even his perfect guyliner was smudged.

She wanted to laugh at this small thing, but couldn't. All she could do was let a strangled croak escape.

She could forgive him.

"I was out late last night for you, I wanted to make something special for our anniversary for you. If you had just listened..."

She poked his forehead (as he so loved to do to her large one.) with a scowl. "Hey, hey, don't turn this on me." Chuckling, he stood up, using his momentum to throw her over his shoulder. He gave her rear a squeeze. The pinkette let loose a small squeak.

"Deidara! Don't do that you asshat." She pouted. She was rewarded with another squeeze as he moved them to his art room. This must be something special, as she usually kept clear of his area of respite and creation. He set her gently down beside him and covered her eyes with his large hands.

He shuffled her around until he had her facing the right way for his surprise. Sakura shoved his hands off her eyes, patience once again being tested. Her eyes focused ahead of her.

A large gasp was pulled from her lungs at the sight. It was a painting! She was amazed at his accuracy, and recognized the painting was a replica of a picture of her. Tears burned in her eyes and made her nose sting unpleasantly, almost like a punishment for her treatment of Deidara. God, she felt like shit now.

He wrapped his arms around her middle from behind, pulling her closer to rest his head on her slender shoulder. His beautiful golden hair spilt over and on to her collar bone. Deidara always seemed to smell so nice, it wasn't fair. His clean, spicy smell hit her, along with the scent of his shampoo.

"Do you like it?" His warm breath brushed over her ear. A large grin appeared on her face as she whirled around to face him. She stood on tippy toes to hug around his neck.

"I love it! It's so beautiful... I- I'm so sorry for the way I assumed-"

His lips caught hers, silencing her apologies. It was already forgiven.

She looked up with tears in her eyes, her mint green eyes sparkling.

"Was it worth my being late?" He queried.

"Yes, I love it so much." One lone tear streaked down her face. His smooth artist's thumb came up to cradle her cheek and wiped away her tear.

A small smile adorned both their faces as he leaned down to press a tender kiss to her large forehead. "I love you so much," he murmured.

"I love you too," She hummed.

His lips finally met hers in a sweet kiss, once twice, thrice, and then they separated, gazing into each others eyes.

"Promise me you'll stay." His clear blue eyes sparkled with hope and desire.

"I will, for as long as you want me... I'll stay." They shared another tight hug, their warmth spreading.

And they were happy... For now.

'I don't like you, but I love you, so please stay...'

Cute DeiSaku fluffy plot bunnies. Did you like it? Should I continue? Review!

-Vale-dick-torian

Update: An author whom I hold in high regards gave me helpful feedback, so decided to edit this one, which indeed was lacking. Thank you, Hazel Roses.


	2. Kitten

The little cat let loose an adorable mew. "You bought a cat?!" Sakura was incredulously gaping at him. "Isn't he so cute, yeah?" Deidara gave a rather fond look to the kitten. She let out a long suffering sigh.

"Yes, I suppose it is, isn't it? What should we name him?" She looked far away, wrapped up in her own world. Her brows crinkled together in deep thought. The small kitten padded over silently and rubbed himself all over her, getting cream colored furs on her dark shirt and pants. Deidara swore the kitten gave him a look that said, 'she's mine.' He was taken aback at how possessive something the size of a baseball could be.

He shot the kitten a glare, and he could swear that the kitten was giving him a smug look from on her lap. The fur ball was purring like a motor. Deidara was instantly jealous of the cat's position. He was jealous._ Of a cat_. How pathetic, even Sasori would laugh at him, and that was really weird. He immediately looked away with a pout as Sakura absently stroked the cat's fur.

Sometimes she was so lost in the clouds, not paying attention to the things around her. The kitten's big golden eyes were half lidded at the pets he was receiving. He started kneading his paws in to her thigh. Even Deidara hadn't gotten that far with her. That cat was getting farther than her own boyfriend did.

_'This isn't fair!' _He screamed internally. " _I shouldn't have gotten him, now I'm having competition with a cat for her affections!' _She seemed to be coming back down to earth.

"How about Winslow?" She suggested. "Sure, whatever you want, yeah. I don't care."

"Babe, why are you so down, you seemed so happy to have brought the kitten home."

"Yeah, well things change." Turning away with a huff, he crossed his arms in a grumpy manner.

"Are you... Jealous of our kitten?"

"No, yeah."

"So yes?"

_"No!"_

She let loose a little giggle at her boyfriend's behavior. "It's not funny yeah." He slouched down even more at the teasing tone in her voice. He was insecure, because they had vowed not to go all the way until they were married, and was staring to feel like she didn't want him.

"Is this about our promise? Because I still love you Dei, that's not gonna change." She gave a tender smile, even though he couldn't see it, as he was facing away from her.

Sakura cooed at his demeanor, trying to cheer him up. The kitten was circling around her ankles, searching for attention, but she was focused only on Deidara. "Don't feel bad, I just... Feel nervous about that kind of stuff, you know?"

"Yeah... I know and I'm sorry. Sometimes I just get paranoid." She knew it was taking a lot out of him to come out and confess his feelings. He always tried to hide his feelings, because it wasn't 'manly' to express sad emotions.

Her arms wrapped around him from his back. The kitten gave a whiny mew from being displaced from his spot on her lap.

Tippy toed, she told him,"No kitten comes before you, I chose to be with you."

"You're my favorite."


	3. Greaser

Greaser: ___Slang, __A___swaggering young tough man, especially a member of a street gang.

The teenage girl wiped her hands on her apron, then combed her finger through her hair to get her bangs out of her eyes. They fell right back in to place on her large forehead. Her hair was pulled up into a high ponytail that swished when she walked. How obnoxious.

Sakura held a carefully balanced tray on her hand as she sashayed over to her assigned table.

She had to focus so she wouldn't let a sneer creep onto her face. Greasers. A whole band of those babbling bunch of baboons. Their raucous laughter and tough appearance scared the other customers away.

"What's with the frown, sweetheart?" A man with tan skin and a plethora of tattoos addressed her.

She must've let her feelings make an appearance on her mild face. Not deigning him with a proper reply, she set the tray down with more force than needed. It was obvious that she held distaste for their lot. "Here's your drinks," she nearly growled, "anything else for you... Gentlemen?" Snickers were heard at her forced politeness.

It took a huge amount of effort to not roll her eyes or place her fists on her hips.

"Yeah, we'll take 6 of the classic burgers, babe." The man who addressed her was pale, with silver hair slicked back onto his skull. He had a lazy, smug look on his face, one that she'd be glad to wipe off. She wouldn't do anything though. They all had similar looks on their stupid faces, as they were used to being top dog.

A redhead near the back of the large booth switched his wooden toothpick to the other side of his mouth. Sakura realized she had been gaping at their brazen manner. The redhead quirked his eyebrow.

Immediately, she turned around with a flush she hoped they missed. A chortle from an unidentified male proved her hopes void. Shuffling away, she happily let her previously annoying bangs hide her eyes.

She clipped the order onto the line, and right away the cook grabbed the order. Another round of loud laughter made her flinch and grip her pen harder, knuckles white. Okay, so maybe she was guy shy. But it wasn't her fault! Only this year, her senior year, had she been transferred to a public school. God knows why. Before this, she had only gone to an all girls' school. How cliche, she knew.

"HARUNO! Get your head out of the clouds! Take this order to your table!"

"More like the only table right now." She muttered under her breath. Taking good care to not stare at their crude manners, she skillfully set down the serving tray once more. Quickly handing out the hot plates of food, she was ready to scurry like a mouse away from the loud, intimidating boys. The worst part was, they knew her from school... Of course, they had no idea who she was specifically by name, and vice versa. Obviously she had heard of this rowdy group, but she was timid.

At least, around boys, especially unfamiliar ones.

Only having one or two friends, Sakura mostly kept to herself. "Do you need anything else?" She put up an annoyed front to hide her nervousness. However, she couldn't hide her shifting from foot to foot, or refusing to meet their eyes. A large man(?) with oddly spiked/slicked hair in a color so black it looked blue, had a grin spread over his face.

_A little mouse huh? What a cutie..._

He shared a glance over his Coke at his best friend, who had an understanding look in his eyes. She was adorable, and obviously naive if she thought they didn't notice. They had beat people up before for her kind of cheek, but they wouldn't hurt a girl. Especially one who looked so nervous and small. It was all rather funny to them.

Kisame could practically feel the same brainwaves coming off his gang. Time to tease Little Mousey.

"Hey little girl," the lazy redhead spoke for the first time since being here, "there's a pickle on my burger, I don't like pickles and I _specifically_ said no pickles, take it back."

_The absolute NERVE of this, this punk!_ She had never seen such a rude person!

"Some time today, little girl." Her teeth were tightly locked together to keep from saying something nasty. She picked up his dish carefully, the violent urge to smash it on his head was running wild. Her imagination could be very... Mean? She swiftly turned foot, knowing the faster she got away, the better. She took as long of strides as her small body could make. Shoulders stiff, she shoved the plate over to the cook, whispering the redhead's ridiculous problem. Cook let out a snort, but complied.

They were the only customers, and Sakura wanted a good tip. So she would hold her tongue until they were gone. A new, pickle-free burger was out in almost an instant. The pinkette was 99% sure that nobody had made special requests for their meals. Maybe he was only doing it to give her trouble, and she wouldn't put it past them to do something so immature.

Once again making her way back to the table, looking at them again made her almost see red. They thought this was funny! Very nearly shattering the plate and rattling the table, she put his meal down again.

"Something wrong, cutie, yeah?" A blond with long hair pulled halfway up in a sloppy manner trained his one visible eye on her. His eye sparkled with knowing mischief and humor.

_Is something wrong?! Is he SERIOUS?!_

Her green eyes bugged for a second, before she gave her best pokerface. "No," she stated, a small tremble in her voice from anger. Shoulders tense, she went to go sulk in another area, before one more voice spoke.

"Hey babe, the ice melted in my drink, get me a new one." The other blacked haired one with stress marks on his admittedly handsome face commanded imperiously. It was clear he was used to girls mooning over him.

They were all handsome in their own way, even if one of them reminded her of a shark. She immediately rejected these traitorous thoughts. _No, they are not, they couldn't find their behinds with both their hands even if they tried._

She snatched up his drink as he gave her a wink, and her knuckles went white. So close to dumping his watered down drink on his dumb head, she barely contained herself.

Striding away, the greasers couldn't help but look at her pert behind.

"Nice," the chorus was quietly heard around the table, followed by chuckles. All of them had nearly finished their food, but they were eager to enjoy their in-meal entertainment.

After Itachi had finished his drink they would leave.

Their little mouse came bustling over again, the only showing of her anger was in her grip of the cup.

She was careful to put the drink down so she wouldn't spill it. Sakura was ready to rip out her hair, and they still didn't look like they were gonna leave soon. Luckily, she shifted her eyes to the clock, she only had 20 minutes left until closing time.

The pink haired waitress could almost feel their burning stares. God she wished that they'd leave soon. As if hearing her pleas, she heard the shuffling of moving people, and her head whipped around, excited to see that they were finally leaving. _Thank the Sweet Lord in heaven._ Such a strong feeling of relief stole over her. They left the money for the food on the table, but as she counted, Sakura realized that they hadn't left a tip...

This time, not holding back, she dug her hands into her hair and shrieked her frustration. At the bottom of the stack, she found something that made her want to go break their idiot faces.

There was a series of numbers, obviously a phone number on a dollar bill. On the other side it said: see you tomorrow, little mouse.


	4. You Are a Pirate!

Pirate: a person who attacks and robs ships at sea.

Sakura's breathing was quick, her heart beating like a humming bird's. She couldn't believe her eyes. Making an effort to breathe more quietly, lest she be caught, she watched the scene taking place outside from her peep hole. Only small flashes of action came through, but it was enough to confirm her fears. The vultures of the sea. Pirates.

Maybe she should have expected that someone would try to loot a cargo ship, especially one that contained silks and cloth from China and spices from India. All of these items were sold at a hefty price, no doubt it would attract thieves.

The pinkette was no thief, she simply was a harmless stow-away. Rude people might call her a squatter. So maybe she took some food... And spices, but she was poor! You can't blame her, but if there was anything she wasn't, it was dirty pirate. The myth that women aboard, even secretly, cause bad luck seemed to be true. She almost felt guilty, but then remembered this totally wasn't her fault.

Seated on a pile of silks, she realized that they would check in here. Fat chance that they would leave her be. They'd probably sell her on the black market, because even though she didn't eat as well as she should, she could be considered pretty. At least that's what she had been told. With a soft, round face, doe eyes, Cupid's bow mouth and porcelain skin, she had the potential to be a knockout. With her pink hair, it made her look even more exotic. The dirt smudged on her face and body along with the rags she wore made it hard to see the underneath.

A man(?) with long blond came dashing by, possibly chasing a crew member on this ship. Another man with messy red hair followed at a slower pace. For a heart stopping moment, he back tracked and stared at the door to the room she was hiding in.

She immediately drew her face away from her peep hole, stumbling away from the door, and fell with a poof onto the silks.' Shitshitshitshitshit.' That was the only thing running over her mind, repressing all other thoughts, like how to escape. Sakura accepted to wait for her fate, and maybe she would have the chance to run and dive off the ship.

Unlike many others, she was raised in a port town, and knew how to swim. She took like a duck to water, and her clothes were light enough to not drag her around. If only she could get to port or starboard (1).

The thumps of his footsteps came ever closer, possibly signing her death certificate. A small whimper escaped her mouth, and her eyes snapped shut. She slapped a hand over her traitorous mouth, and tried to prevent the tears threatening to spill. A lone tear streaked down her cheek, cutting a trail through the grime.

Sakura burrowed further into the soft fabrics, hoping to hide, at least until he picked up the silk. His body was now blocking the light of the doorway. The doorknob jiggled and jostled, but she knew the lock wouldn't keep a pirate out for long. Her predictions came true, almost as if he heard her, the door buckled beneath his foot with a mighty crash.

Cowering in to her hiding spot, all she could do was send a prayer to The Lord for mercy from these brutes. More gunshots and screaming filtered in from the now destroyed doorway. Uproarious laughter hit her ears like a cruel drum. Now she knew why they'd called her "street rat", she was cornered like one.

It was now or never, she could run, or wait to die. The second didn't seem like an option to her. The pinkette sprang up from the precious fabrics like a hare, dodging the stunned redhead, and bounding over the smashed door. She was sure she'd never moved so fast in her life, not caring that her feet were gathering splinters. Life was definitely more important at this moment. Her arms pumped by her sides as she struggled to escape this maze of a ship.

The sound of heavy footsteps behind her made her want to throw up. _There! _There, she saw the light that signaled the entrance to the upper deck. Everything around her was blurring, her survival instincts zeroing in on the whiff of freedom. The unknown male seemed to be quickly gaining ground on her. Lungs burning, she could only try to pump her legs faster.

Sakura flew up the stairs like a bat out of hell. For one terrible moment, she felt his fingers brush her ankle, but she was too quick. The sun that she hadn't dared to see for weeks nearly blinded her, cause her legs to give. _No!_ She didn't have time for this.

The sound of deep voices around her was terrifying, so she stood up, and ran around without any sense of where she was going. She had to reach a side eventually, right? Now more than one person was chasing her, and her sight was slowly coming back.

"C'mere little girl! Stop running!"

Suddenly a large, blue arm came out of nowhere to buckle around her waist like a band of steel. She started to squirm against the much taller man, writhing in his grip. "I'd stop that, little girl, before I do something you won't like." His hot breath hit her exposed ear, making her stop and shiver. Heart pounding ever faster, she felt ready to vomit.

All that was left of her struggles was a slight shivering of fear. "Let me go." She whimpered. By this time many others of his crew had gathered to look at her like she was some exotic bird. Maybe she was to them.

They all seemed to have a good laugh at her squeak when the shark-like man hoisted her over his shoulder. The girl's tiny fists beat against his broad back, hurting her hands more than him. She felt his rumbling chuckling and a squeeze on her rump. Furious, she let out an enraged squeal. They only laughed again. A sigh left her, and she flopped down like a dead fish.

"Give up lil' mousy?"

She grunted. The redhead and blond she had seen earlier trotted behind the blue behemoth, snickering at her. The blond man caught her staring, and grinned. He reached forward and tugged on a lock of her hair. "Pretty, yeah."

"Like a little doll," murmured the man with lazy eyes.

"Hold on squirt, things are gunna get bumpy. _INCOMING!_"

Suddenly she was flying through the air, stomach in her throat. She screamed as she was tossed overboard. Just as she was sure she was going to die, Sakura was caught by another pair of arms, apparently on a different ship. She shakily removed the hands she kept plastered to her eyes and looked at the person cradling her.

He had brightly flaming orange hair, lavender eyes that seemed to ripple, and piercings of iron all over him. His leer that was cast over her body made her want to shrivel under the heat of it.

Several thuds indicated that the rest of those ruffians had reboarded their (most likely stolen) ship. The mysterious male made it obvious he would continue to keep her in his grip as he turned around.

Sakura looked over the visible crew, all of them looking crazy and excited. Many had armfuls of chests and silks, containing unknown treasure.

"Who's this?" The pierced man asked shark-boy-wonder. Hehe. Shark-boy.

Making fun of them in her mind was the only way for her to fight back.

"Oh, she's an apology fer my messup captn'." Blue-face rubbed the back of his head sheepishly. They all took an agonizingly long look at her, now that the spotlight was hers. Her skin must've been on fire under her grime, she was sure.

"Can't see mucha her under that filth, get'er cleaned." It was spoken as a command from their apparent captain. A new man with long, tangly black hair tied low stepped forward, long rope in hand. He tied it firmly around her waist several times, picked her up along with the slack, and threw her off the starboard side.

There was no one in the water to catch her as she was plunged into the freezing ocean, screaming all the way. A few heads peered over the edge as the man with the rope tugged her to the surface. The rope was then let slack, once, twice, three times dipping her, before they began hauling her up. The rope cut uncomfortably into her gut, but she'd rather die in the ocean than go back up. Alas, she gazed longingly at the sea, Sakura had no choice.

She felt and most probably looked like a drowned rat. _'Fitting_,' she thought cynically. After finally being pulled back into the ship, she flopped like a dead fish on the deck, coughing water from her poor lungs. The rope was cut from her waist from the back, and she was then rolled over for inspection.

The disgusting leering of the men had only increased, so she guessed her impromptu bath did its job. Coughing wetly, she struggled to sit up, but was once again hauled up by strong hands.

'_Let's pass around the Sakura doll,'_ she grumped internally.

After Blondie (as she had dubbed him) put her in some semblance of standing, her chin was gripped by metal-face. He turned her face left, then right, as if examining a piece of livestock. A pleased smirk graced his mouth, liking what he saw.

"I'll keep her."

...

_"WHAT?!"_

Annnnnnnd... Done with with the pirate AU! Starboard and bow mean the left an right side of a ship. Any prompts or suggestions? If you review I'll make you a personal one shot request for this story! Review!


	5. Addiction

**WARNING, DARK AU AHEAD! SERIOUS TRIGGER WARNING! IMPLIED RAPE AND GRAPHIC DRUG ADDICTION!**

**Addiction**

**: a strong and harmful need to regularly have something (such as a drug) or do something (such as gamble)**

**: an unusually great interest in something or a need to do or have something**

Highway to Hell

She viciously stuck the needle into her skin, shooting up. This wasn't the first time, and it wouldn't be the last. She was addicted. Hand shaking, eye twitchingly addicted. The rush of liquid urged her to let loose a shaky sigh at getting her fix. The effects weren't coming, not yet. It took too long, even a second without the heady feeling was agony.

Unlike many portrayals that show you getting addicted with the first shot, that's not how reality for her was. Sakura had started with easy pill popping. Just a little, not even addicting. There were no withdrawals, and with the high it gave you, it was worth taking more and more. The pinkette was flying, that was the only way to describe these feelings.

Common sense wasn't so common, and seemed to be absent in her. So far gone, that she (almost) couldn't see the abscesses, her lank, dull appearance, or her spidery veins. It had made her smarter, so now the needle went between her toes. As long as she could escape, if only for the night, it was worth the agony of the rebound.

Safe, she was safe as the warmth invaded her. That was all she ever wanted. Neither home nor family and friends could provide it. As if she had any. Well, she had a mom, but she was no better. When Sakura was flying, her mom was crashing, drowning in amber liquid.

She had no fucking clue where her dad was, and if she didn't know that two people had to have sex to produce a baby, she might as well have been a respawn of her mom. Except (supposedly) she had some features of her father.

Ask if she gave a rat's ass.

No.

She swore she could feel the dope flowing. This batch seemed to be more pure. It was wonderful. Her back was leaning against the cool pole of her childhood playground swing set.

The first time she took it, it was horrible. Vomit had come surging up and she had never felt shittier in her life. Why did she do it again? Nobody knows, not even her.

She was a failure and she knew it. Her boyfriend of two years... Itachi(?) wasn't with her. He was a good boy and dumped her like his father told him to. 'All she is, is trouble!' She could almost hear Fugu-fish's voice in her head. He supposedly still 'loved' her. Tch, what did she see in him? He wasn't there, and that's all that mattered.

He can get fucked.

No longer did she have good grades, or friends. It was lucky if she even showed up to school, and when she did, it was because the law required it. Time meant nothing, nothing meant anything, as long as she flew. The only thing she could keep track of now was where her spoons were.

Sakura gave a dark chuckle at her inner joke. Another surge of warmth rolled over her, making her toss her head back. The high wouldn't last much longer now, because after so much time was spent soaring, she was building a resistance.

When she was in rehab, that'd been hell. Never again. She was willing to play Russian Roulette with her monster, excited to, even. It was a mixed bag of fun, you never knew exactly what you were gonna get.

How long had it been? Hours? Minutes? No idea. She had seemingly moved too.

Inside a car, that's where she was. How? Who cares. It was moving, but she couldn't bother to check who the driver was. Not her mom, her mom was wasted.

They had stopped, where were they?

The pinkette was dragged into a house, maybe a shed. Rough hands moved her like some sort of living doll or morbid action figure. It was a man, she could tell now. His foul breath made her gag.

Her clothes were quickly discarded, though not by her. Ripping sounds filled the air, her clothes ruined.

His lips brushed hers as she was laid down.

Should she care? Maybe she would later.

Okay y'all, that was pretty dark. There was an itty bitty bit of ItaSaku. My own addiction to heroin (and other drugs) inspired this story. I've actually been 3 months sober/clean. Drug use is a dark place, don't get pulled in. Take your needed medications though. Bipolar and severe depression ruined my life for a while, and made me go to the 'mental' ward. I'm getting the help I need now, and couldn't be better. If anybody wants to talk, pm me. Goodbye for now, - Vale-dick-torian.


	6. Taking Care of Business

Taking Care of Business

Summary: KakuSaku business AU

Kakuzu is her boss, and he is not pleased that she is continually late. Humor, smut

Kakuzu looked up from his papers as he heard the door creak open slowly. So she thought he wouldn't notice she was late? "Sir, I'm so sorry that I'm la-" "Save it."

"Your work ethic leaves much to be desired, as you're always late by at least ten minutes. Always have an excuse, don't you?"

"I-I..."

"Come here, you need to be disciplined."

His face was stony, with no emotion to be seen.

"Sir...?" Her eyebrows furrowed in confusion, nose bunching up

"You'll learn the error of your ways Ms. Haruno."

Sakura nervously shuffled over to her intimidating boss. Once she was in arms reach of him, he took a harsh grip on her wrist. She let out a gasp of surprise when he pulled her into his lap. Wriggling, she tried to stand up when he tightened his grip and grunted, slightly thrusting up into her bottom.

The pinkette squeaked in shock at his possessive grasp, feeling the stiffness of the tent of his pants. "Sir?"

"Shhh... Just relax. I promise you'll enjoy yourself." Sakura settled slightly in his lap, knowing just how strong he was, plus he was unbelievably sexy. Kakuzu's wandering hands pulled at her skirt, his callouses catching on the fabric. His warm, large hands found the small zipper on the side of her skirt, tugging it down. He maneuvered her so she was standing between his legs, knees slightly bumping against the chair.

The fabric sagged slightly over her hips and her rear. Sakura quickly shed the skirt and wiggled out of her stockings clumsily, having to grab his shoulder to keep her balance. Her hands made their way to the first button on her shirt.

"Stop. Kneel."

"Excuse me?"

"I meant what I said, Haruno."

"O-okay..."

Sakura reluctantly kneeled down in front of him, looking up through her lashes.

"Suck. Me."

Hands fumbling, she pulled his zipper down, and shyly tugged down his boxers, letting his length spring free. His curly, coarse hair down below led up to a delicious treasure trail.

His member was intimidating, it was true, and she had never done this before. The tip was weeping slightly in anticipation. She gently grasped him as he sucked in a breath. Leaning forward slightly her small pink tongue came out to brush over the tip, licking off the salty, bitter liquid.

Kakuzu's hand immediately buried into her hair, plunging her mouth onto him. She tried to recoil at the unpleasant choking sensation, but he wouldn't let her. Her hands came up to grip his thighs as her head was bobbed up and down on him.

"That's the spot..." He let out a deep, satisfied groan, while Sakura's eyes gathered tears from her aching jaws. She moaned desperately, wanting air. Her sweet tongue traced the thick vein on the underside of his shaft, but he was so thick there wasn't very much room to move her tongue. Suddenly his hips jerked sporadically, hitting her gag reflex as he let loose several globs of seed down her throat. It tasted horrible.

"Swallow." He demanded darkly. His hand pushed her head down further, so it was either choke or swallow, so she let the foul liquid down her throat. He finally untangled his hand from her mane and dropped his head onto the chair, sagging from his release. Sakura coughed a bit, her airway finally free.

Strong arms wrapped around her waist, encouraging her to stand. "Lay over my lap."

Afraid to refuse him again, she gingerly bent over his knees like a naughty child. Her panties were pulled down, exposing her round, soft globes of flesh to his hungry eyes.

Rough hands smoothed over her tender flesh, then were gone. Dread settled in her tummy, predicting what was coming next. A stinging slap caused her to jolt forward and squeal at the pleasure-pain.

"Be quiet, somebody will hear us. For every noise you make, I will add one more to your punishment. Count each one, you get ten."

"Yes sir." Her eyes clenched shut.

His hand came down once more, turning her bum a pleasing shade of red. "One," she counted out, her lip trembling. His hands rained down on her sore behind as she kept track of the numbers. After every other spank, he would run his hands over her smarting skin, to soothe her. He occasionally dipped his fingers into her wetness, causing shudders of pleasure.

"Ten!" She squealed, glad the spanking was over. He pulled her upright, kissing the wet corners of her eyes as if to apologize. Kakuzu's member had seemed to come back to life, rubbing against her core.

His hips bumped hers. "Ride me." He commanded, eyes half lidded. Large hands came to grab onto her hips, steadying her as she lowered herself on him. Sakura had never been so stretched or full in her life as she sunk on to him. He was hung. Kakuzu adored how her soft, pink petals spread around his invading length, olive skin and black hair meeting pale skin and a pink thatch of curls. His cock shone with her slick arousal, plowing in and out of her.

She was constantly jolted by his harsh thrusts, getting the breath knocked out of her at every pounding of his hips. The wet slapping sound of flesh made her cheeks turn into an adorable shade of pink, her eyes hazy with pleasure. He loved the tiny noises she made, and the look on her delicate face. Her hips were rolling against his, both of them glued together in pleasure.

"Hah ahh ahh..." Her head was tossed back, sweaty locks spilling down her back. His lips latched on to the junction of of her neck and shoulder, biting and suckling on the tender flesh. He took a second to pull back and admire his handiwork. Yep, there'd definitely be a bruise there by tomorrow.

Her warm snatch was clenching around him, her strong inner muscles rippling. Kakuzu let out a pleasure filled growl. Fingers held her hips in a bruising grip, their pleasure overwhelming, both ready to climax. The chair was creaking ominously under them, but they couldn't care less. Both of them were hurtling to their ends, noises escaping their raw throats.

Collapsing forward, she let out a muffled scream in to his strong neck, jerking her hips in the aftershocks of her climax, her sheath grasping him rapidly. Sakura sagged against him, worn out. Kakuzu, however, wasn't done. He pushed her body on to his desk, the wood supporting her as he continued to fuck her. Her arms weakly curled around him, legs brushing his hips, all she could do now was hang on for the ride.

The desk wobbled under his furious, jarring thrusts, a drop of sweat trailing down his forehead at the strain. She let out pitiful whimpers at the forceful pounding, her body sore.

A few deep, sporadic thrusts signaled his orgasm as hot jets of seed plastered her insides. Kakuzu let out a primal growl at filling her up. He slumped down on her, face buried into her still clothed chest. Both were a tired, panting mess as he pulled out and away from her, though he pulled her on to his lap again to rest.

Kakuzu leaned forward to whisper, "This isn't all, you still have a lot of late days to make up to me, ." His hot breath tickling her ear.

She let out a tired moan, eyes fluttering closed.

What she didn't see though, was a rare, fond and crooked smile grace his lips, hand stroking her now wild mane.

Wow! My third lemon ever! How did I do? Review, and leave suggestions or comments!

Next chapter: SasoSaku Ancient Greece myth AU

The oracle of Ammon announced that no relief would be found until the king exposed his daughter Andromeda (Sakura) to the monster, Cetus, and so she was fastened naked to a rock on the shore. Perseus (Sasori) slew the monster and, setting her free, claimed her in marriage. Drama.


	7. Andromeda's Galaxy

Hey everybody, I know last chapter I promised a deisaku, but I've already done two of those, so I figured our main man Sasori-no-danna should be the next lucky lad. Don't worry, each Akatsuki member will get their own chapter.

Summary:  
The oracle of Ammon announced that no relief would be found until the king exposed his daughter Andromeda (Sakura) to the monster, Cetus, and so she was fastened naked to a rock on the shore. Perseus (Sasori) slew the monster and, setting her free, claimed her in marriage. Drama.

Andromeda's Galaxy

'What had her mother done!?' Sakura loved her mother, she really did, but only a fool would make the claim Mebuki had made. More beautiful than the Nereids? No, no matter how lovely her mother was, there was no competing with the nymphs. Nothing good would ever come from challenging the gods, nothing.

Now, here she was, chained to a fucking rock, naked as the day she was born, because her mom couldn't keep her big fat mouth shut. Apparently the punishment of boasting against the sea nymphs was getting a sea monster sicked on the entire nation. This is fucking ridiculous. It was rumored that Poseidon had a nasty temper, but so did she, and she certainly wouldn't destroy an entire country because of what one queen had said. Were the nymphs' egos so fragile that they couldn't handle one measly slight? She recoiled slightly, this was the pattern of thinking that got Mebuki (and herself by proxy) in trouble.

Once the monster Cetus had come to their coast, wreaking havoc on everyone and everything, her parents had panicked, looking for a solution. They had found the oracle of Ammon, who had said that in order for this madness to stop, I had to be sacrificed. Bullshit, that dumb oracle had it out for her. Maybe she'd come back as a ghost and haunt them. That'd be good. Yeah, sounds like a plan.

A thunderous roar in the distance tore her away from her macabre thoughts, and out to the raging sea. Splashes of salt water came up to sting her delicate skin, leaving it raw from the onslaught. She knew that that'd be the least painful experience for her today. The pinkette couldn't say that she was excited to be mauled and killed. She'd probably get eaten too, hopefully after she was dead.

Her wrists and feet hurt, and she wished that she could at least be comfortable before she died. The stone didn't exactly feel to good on her rear and back either. The waves grew more and more aggressive, signaling that the behemoth was coming closer. Her knees were knocking together, teeth chattering, and her eyes dilated in fear. No matter how grumpy she might act, Cetus was fucking terrifying.

Her thoughts were as scrambled as the ocean's waves, never ending. She could see his scaly body cutting through the waves like a knife. Obviously the volatile water did nothing to deter him from devouring her. The instincts to flee were strong within, leading Sakura to struggle against her bindings. All that actually happened was her nearly pulling her arms out of their sockets.

Bile moved up her throat, the burning bringing tears of fear and pain, caUsing her eyes to glitter. Hair was flying wildly as she thrashed, hoping for a miracle.

His long neck rose from the water, and the pinkette swore she could see a grin on his hideous face. His face was wrinkled and his nose pushed in in the ugliest of ways. Jagged, yellow teeth stuck out haphazardly from his grotesque, grinning jaws. Even though he was a good fifteen feet from her, his fishy stench invaded her nostrils, and then she really did throw up her bile.

As his body came closer, shadow looming, her eyes no longer held her tears, as they made their salty tracks down her pale cheeks.

She closed her eyes, not wanting to see her death staring at her in the face. A blast of air and a warrior's cry sounded from somewhere to her left. Her eyes bugged open, wanting to see who'd be dumb enough to confront this beast.

'It was a man!' He was running on air it seemed, but taking a closer look, his sandals were winged. 'His shoes had wings!? What the heck?' His helm reflected golden light into her eyes. On his back there was a satchel, what it contained was a mystery though. Blood red hair was ruffled around in the commotion.

The mystery man was ducking and weaving about, infuriating Cetus. A terrible screech erupted from the monster's mouth, his bulging, bloodshot eyes swiveling around, trying to keep track of the agile man.

Her hero landed with grace in front of her, his sword releasing her from her binds. All the blood rushed down to her limbs, causing heat and uncomfortable prickling sensations. The pinkette vigorously rubbed her sore wrists, groaning from the painful bruises she had acquired.

The man had once more turned around to face her tormentor. He no longer looked at her, probably so she could keep at least a little modesty.

'That's right... I'm naked!' Her face and chest area seemed to erupt in a brilliant shade of pink at her nudity.. She quickly brushed her wild pink hair in front of her breasts to hide them. Her embarrassment and vanity were dumb, she knew, but stroking her hair helped calm her down.

The warrior twists so he was looking back at her.  
"Close your eyes!" He bellowed.  
Not knowing why, she immediately obeyed him, but her curiosity and panic wanted her to open them. Sakura persisted though, not even daring to open her eyes.

There was a rustling of leather, then a terrible groan and roar of pain. It sounded like a rock was crumbling, then all noise stopped. The sea was still, and there was no sign of life to be heard.

She could no longer resist the temptation to look, her green eyes popping open. What she saw astounded her. The man was alive! He stood in place, panting, a gash bleeding sluggishly on his arm. She saw a few thin, limp snakes flopping out of his satchel, which now lay on the ground. Sakura gave it a wide berth, rushing over to her savior, wanting to thank him.

Seeing no body of a slain monster, she looked up and around. Her eyes widened in awe, a small gasp choking her lips. Cetus was stone still. Literally. His body was perfectly preserved, made out of gray, wet stone. His face was forever frozen in horror and agony, a terrifying sight indeed.

The now calm waves lapped at the morbid statue, and a balmy breeze blew over her. The stillness of the surrounding environment helped soothe her.

A rough, warm hand came down to lay on her shoulder, startling her. She whipped around, staring around and up, looking at the man. He was handsome, it was true. His teeth flashed in a tired grin, a long breath washing over her face.

His hand squeezed lightly, trying to convey comfort to the shaken up woman.  
She sighed slightly, glad that the ordeal was over.

Sakura couldn't be more grateful.

~Sasori's POV~

She was beautiful, her gorgeous green eyes looking up at him, her eyes moist with tears. His hand adored the feeling of her soft skin under his fingertips.

She was what he wanted, and he was glad he made it in time to rescue this woman.

His usually hard brown eyes softened, but it would be only for her. He wanted to touch her pouty lips, so he did. His thumb came up to stroke it, delighted at her willingness and the texture of her delectable mouth.

All he wanted now was her, all of her, she would be his wife. As cheesy as it sounded, he'd never felt this way before. Never had he felt this tender emotion, such caring for another person. Deidara would definitely bust his gut laughing if he saw his hard-ass friend melting for a veritable (though lovely) stranger.

He was past the point of caring; Sasori felt what he felt, and that was that.

He gently scooped her in his arms, and had a battle of wills to keep his eyes focused solely on her face. In one bound he was off, and a pleased rumbled sounded in his chest as she wound her arms around his neck.

"Let's go home, princess."

So how'd y'all like it? Leave a review? It means a lot to me when you do leave your opinions, it helps me grow as a writer. I do already have my prompt for this story, but if you'd like a specific oneshot, let me know and I might do it! Thanks for reading!

Next time: HidanSaku high school AU  
Hidan is a total jackass, and Sakura stands up to him, he adores it. Humor.


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